Where do you stand? And are you happy with it?

What do u do when you are an option? Do u stay an option or do you work on being a priority? Or do u stop being an option too?

All these questions apart, how does it affect you when you are an option - always? Why is it that you are an option always? Why cant you be a priority? Are u not good enough? What kind of aura envelops you which always makes you an option?

Sometimes, you might be a priority and not realize it. Sometimes you are a priority and you don't want to be. Sometimes you might be a priority but made to feel like an option. And sometimes you might be made to feel like a priority but actually you might be an option! How do you find out what is the case actually? And which of these is a better situation to be in?

Is there a test to find out all of these? Or are there only feelings? If there are only feelings, then why don't we like what we feel? And if at all we like what we feel, why is it that that feeling does not stay with us? Why is it difficult to accept the situation we are in? Why does our head and heart go in two different directions? And if they go in two different directions then what should we follow? Mostly, I guess we should follow the head. But in the matters of heart, why should we follow the head? Isn't the heart suppose to know better in the matters of heart? And even if we follow the head, why doesn't the heart just go with it? Why did God make two things that completely contradict each other in their functioning and ideologies and then put them within us-the human being? Its like, we are a living example of the biggest oxymoron in the entire universe!!

And then within us, put so many other contradictory feelings and logic and then to complicate everything, put us in a contradictory situation. Wow!

If you actually sit and start analyzing all these, I doubt you will remain sane. So then again we come to the same first question- what do you do?

Its like a circle of everything going on and you decide, whether u want to continue living in the circle or break the circle and make a new one- may be not a circle but try make it straight. But again! Doesn't a straight line medically mean we are dead??